You Ask a Girl for a Date:
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Pets, it turns out, can be problems in pictures. It's fine to send along pics of yourself, your residence, and even you in the same picture with your pet, but avoid separate pics of your pets.
"I stay away from lonely guys with big dogs," said one TS girl. The consensus in the chatroom is, definitely no pic of just the dog. Why? Several girls said they worry the dog will be more important to him than she is.
The TS girl you write to wants to know about you, not your ex-wife or ex-girlfriend.
"I don't want to hear about the details of your last relationship," Melissa said.
"I do not want to be compared to the person that rejected them before," Alison added.
"Someone who tells me their emotional drama in the first email is pretty much out of there," Mike in Chicago added, from the male perspective.
Then there is the matter of other experiences with transsexual women.
"I really don't care to hear that he was with a TS once before and enjoyed and that she was an escort he met in a bar," Alison said. "Or that he is curious to be with a TS and see what it's like."
"I don't want to hear that every other TS he ever dated used him for everything he had," Sandra added.
If it is obvious that she is a TS girl seeking a relationship, there is no point in appearing clueless. Cluelessness does not score points. Alison observed, "By all means don't start your email off by asking 'Are you a TS?'"
Be sensitive to the meaning of your words when you ask a girl for a date. Sandra says, "If they want to communicate it's a good idea to get the terminology right. When they say the usually only date girls, that's an insult. And if they say they are not gay, they do not get it at all. And never mention the word 'shemale' in an email."
Most any TS girl seeking a relationship is looking for a straight guy who likes women. But it is a sad fact that many of the emails directed at TS women are from guys looking for a penis. If that's what you want, you are probably making a mistake to approach most TS women about it.
"You have no idea how many guys have asked if you still have 'it' and if it gets hard. They not only don't get a reply, they get added to my junk mail filter list," said Rhonda.
"The main thing is they need to treat us like the women we are, not as some strange sex toy or oddity for them to play with," Alison added.
Guys, do realize that a lot of the TS women at this website are acquainted with each other. If you send the same or similar email out to many girls and they find out about it, and it is very likely that they will, you will leave the wrong impression.
"I've got friends, don't email me the same letter you mailed them," Melissa warned. "Actually when I find out a guy has emailed another girl I know, I don't talk to him. If he's just interested because my profile says TS or pre-op or whatever, then he's really not interested in ME."
Mike in Chicago explained, "When I send an email to someone, it's straight to the point. I say where I found out about them, my website address, and that I found them interesting and to ask if they would like to talk." That's direct, to the point, and without any phony, too-early romantic nonsense.
The bottom line when asking a girl for a date, or just exploring the possibility of doing so, is to be clear, honest and provide enough information about yourself so that you stand out from the crowd in a way that is interesting and appealing.
"They should make themselves sound interesting and honest and tell us something that would make us want to respond," Alison said.
Melissa added: "I would like to see a bit of his personality, what he is really looking for."
So guys just be yourselves.
After all, if you do develop a relationship with this TS girl, she will
have to deal with the real you. If you feed her some prepackaged image
you've concocted, she will find out about it soon enough and she won't
be happy about it. Just tell her what you want, what you're all about,
and what you would like to do on a first date.
Email the editor: Tsgirlfriend4me@aol.com
I reserve all publication rights on this article, but feel free to forward it to anyone you like. Copyright 2003, all publication rights reserved.
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Helpful Hints to Meeting a Trans Girl
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Men Seeking Long-Term Relationships or LTR Dating Relationship
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Pre-Op TS in the Boyfriend Hunt
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When, Why & How to Tell Him That You're a Transsexual
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The topic of this page is how to ask a girl for a date: Your first email to a TS girl.